Back in Your Arms
by Acrs-the-unvs
Summary: Kind of an AU. Addek. What would happen if Meredith Grey never existed? Would Addison still be Addison Shepherd? Find out in 'Back in Your Arms.' Begins at the start of season 2 as if there was no Meredith. CHAPTER THREE IS UP!
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note – I started this a few months ago, but made some revisions so I'm redoing it. This is my second Grey's fic and I didn't even finish the first one. Updates will be sporadic so please stay with me. By the way, I obviously don't own anyone! Happy reading!

**C H A P T E R O N E**

Plane rides had never been worrisome for Addison Montgomery-Shepherd, even when they were delayed and she would end up missing her connecting flight. She was normally calm and collected from takeoff until the landing. But this plane ride was completely different.

Addison wrung her hands tightly together in her lap, causing her knuckles to turn faintly white. Her stiletto-worn foot tapped repetitively as she stared over the man to her right and out the dirty airplane window with discontent. She would occasionally glance around to make sure no one was attempting to bother her without her noticing it.

She was not afraid of crashing. She was not afraid of poor weather conditions causing the plane to circle the air for hours before landing. She was not afraid of getting her elbow bumped by the flight attendant wheeling the drink cart down the aisle. No, Addison was afraid of seeing Derek Shepherd, her husband.

The last time Addison had seen Derek she had been begging him not to leave New York to move to Seattle. Her cheeks had been stained with salty tears and black eyeliner, her hair swept up in knots and her voice hoarse from crying and fighting. He had said such harsh words to her, arguing his point for leaving. And Addison was the first to admit it; he had a pretty damn good point.

The plane did indeed land safely in the Seattle Airport and Addison was forced to step off the plane to the grounds of the wet and dreary city in Washington. She wrestled with the idea of going straight to Seattle Grace Hospital to find Dr. Derek Shepherd before checking into her hotel room, but remembering that she needed a place to put her luggage, Addison caved in and took a ferryboat to her hotel first.

Wasting no time at the hotel, Addison quickly checked into her room, hung up her necessary clothing items on hangers and coated her face with a tad of refresher makeup that had with no doubt been tampered due to her travels. Once Addison was ready to go, she headed to Seattle Grace.

Addison wasn't entirely sure that Derek was working at 9pm on a Friday night, but seeing as Addison had to go to the hospital anyways to meet with Chief of Surgery Richard Webber about a case, it couldn't hurt to go to the hospital then. Chief Webber was most likely not up for visitors at that time of night, but it would be her excuse for her being at Derek's place of work as soon as she reached the city, Addison decided.

The doors to Seattle Grace Hospital slid open in front of her before Addison was ready to enter the building. The lobby was larger than Addison remembered. And whiter. Colder, even. Maybe even a little intimidating?

Addison ran her fingers over the lines on her purse nervously, twisting her head back and forth in search of the other Dr. Shepherd, besides herself of course. Few potted plants lined the floor, a dozen tables were scattered around and a large staircase was positioned in the center of the main room of the hospital. To the left of the entrance was the reception desk and just as Addison turned to ask the receptionist of Derek was working, she saw him.

His hair was longer than the last time she had seen him. Other than that, he was the same old Derek. Same warm eyes, perfect cheekbone structure and that heart-melting smile that made Addison's knees wobble since the day she met him in medical school.

"Addison…what are you doing here?" Derek asked, obviously surprised to see his wife in his new environment.

"Well, you would have known if you had bothered to return any one of my phone calls," Addison stated rather coolly and tried to sound more confident than she really was. "Your hair is different.

Derek sighed, looking exhausted. "A lot of things are different."

"It's longer," Addison noted, stating the first thing she had noticed when she saw him. "I like it. It's very…Russell Crowe."

"What are you doing here?" Derek asked again, more aggravated this time.

"What are you doing here?" Addison asked Derek, her tone growing antsier to match Derek's. "You just pick up and leave everything: your house, your practice, your friends. You had a life in Manhattan."

"Had."

Addison clamped her purse more tightly against her body. Her patience was wearing. She knew it wasn't going to be easy talking to the man to whom she had given everything for so long and then broke his heart.

Derek spoke again. "If you came here to win me back, you can forget about it."

"I did," Addison said, attempting to sound sarcastic. "I flew all the way across the country to reminisce over wedding photos, get drunk, fall into bed and make you realize you can't live without me." She paused to take a deep breath. "Relax, Derek. I'm here for work. I'm helping the T.T.T.S. case you guys admitted last week. And after Richard's briefing—"

Addison continued talking as Derek's expression changed from annoyed to angry and confused. "Richard knew you were coming out here?" He interrupted.

"He asked me to come," Addison told him. "Didn't he tell you?"

"No, he didn't."

"Hm, well, surprised," Addison said with a fake surprised tone. She leaned closer and whispered in his ear. "The hair thing, though. You know I've always had a thing for Russell Crowe."

And with that last lingering statement, Addison turned and walked away. She hoped that that last comment would make Derek remember – even if it were only for a second – the sexy, seductive Addison that Derek Shepherd had fallen in love with so many years ago.


	2. Chapter 2

**C H A P T E R T W O**

Addison's first night at the hotel was restless. He mind had been racing at the speed of light going over her conversation with Derek that night. She analyzed his tone and his mannerisms, down to every last voice inflection, eyebrow raise and hand placement. Addison knew he was mad she was there. He liked his new bubble he had built in Seattle, away from her. But Addison had every intention of popping that bubble and bringing him home. It wouldn't be easy; Derek had made that perfectly clear that night. But Addison was convinced that with enough subtle flirting and witty tactics to remind Derek of how good they used to be together, she could bring him home without resorting to using restraints.

Addison's alarm was set for 6:30am, but there was no need for it seeing as she had been awake since 4am. Her alarm actually startled her as she putting the final touches on her wardrobe. She realized that she had forgotten to turn her alarm off when she had woken up two and a half hours ago and accepted that fact that there was no hope of her ever falling back asleep.

Once Addison was fully put together, she took one final look in the mirror and was satisfied. She left the hotel trying to hold on to her confidence, hoping it would not diminish by the time she reached the hospital.

She had a meeting with Richard at 8am, but since she arrived at Seattle Grace Hospital at 7:15am, even with the ferryboat delay, she figured it was time for more coffee. Apparently two cups at the hotel wasn't enough for Addison.

Addison didn't spot Derek anywhere in the cafeteria and deducted that he was either in surgery or not at the hospital yet. Either that or he had some kind of special 'Addison radar' and knew how to stay within on hundred feet of her at all times. Hoping for the best, Addison went with one of the first two.

It had been two or three years since Addison had seen Richard Webber. Unfortunately, the last time she had seen him he hadn't been enduring recovery from a surgery that helped remove a tumor pressing on his optic nerve. Addison's husband, being the brilliant world class brain surgeon he was, was the lucky one to landed Chief Webber's surgery and fortunate Addison was planning on seeing Derek during her meeting with Richard while Derek would most likely be checking up on Richard's recovery. Fortunate Addison.

The wall clock read '7:47am' and Addison, being as anxious as a kindergartener on the first day of school, decided it was close enough to go-time. She clamped her briefcase to her side and clicked her high heels on the linoleum hospital floor as she headed to the surgery recovery wing of Seattle Grace. After two small knocks on Richard's patient room door, Addison let herself in and her face immediately melted into a warm smile at the sight of her dear old friend, Richard Webber.

"Richard," Addison said, still smiling, and she sat on the edge of his white blanketed bed. "So good to see you!"

Richard sat up a little and grasped Addison's hands in his. "Addie," Richard replied, using the nickname only a select handful of people could call Addison Shepherd. "Now, you're a sight for sore eyes."

The two laughed at Richard obviously literal joke after his surgery to better Richard's eyes sight.

"I missed you," Addison said and squeezed Richard's hands. "How are you feeling?"

"Oh, I've been better," Richard admitted. "'Course, I've been worse, too."

"The surgery went okay?"

"The surgery went just fine," Richard reassured Addison. "I mean, it's Derek." Richard's face flushed red with slight embarrassment. "I'm sorry, Addison."

Addison forced a weak smile. "Hey, I'm fine," Addison said breezily. "Let's talk about this Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome case. What do we have on it?"

Dr. Addison Shepherd and Dr. Richard Webber discussed Addison's neo-natal case for a while longer until the issues were worn down and the two doctors ran out of medical topics to discuss. Before Addison could worry about Richard bringing up the touchy subject of her and Derek's separation, Derek Shepherd himself walked into Richard's room.

"Richard," Derek said with a nod towards him, not breaking his eye contact. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, Derek," Richard said in a tired voice as if the question had been constantly flowing from Derek's mouth since the surgery. "Do you want to say 'hi' to your wife?"

Derek clamped his teeth together and his jaw tightened. He slowly twisted his neck so he was facing Addison. "Hi, Addison."

Addison smiled graciously and politely. "Hello, Derek."

Derek turned back to Richard the second Addison was finished speaking. "I'm gonna do a quick exam on you."

"Derek, I'm fine," Richard repeated with more agitation in his voice than before.

"I'm sure you are," Derek said. "I just want to make sure."

Richard rolled his eyes as Derek pulled his stethoscope from around his neck.

"I'm gonna get out of your way," Addison suggested and slid towards the door.

"Addison," Richard said to grab her attention before she left. "The patient's chart is up at the front desk if you want to get a head start on it. Ask Miranda Bailey for one of her interns to assist you on the case. If you have any questions…I'll be here."

Addison smiled gratefully at Richard's kindness. "Thanks Richard. Good to see you again."

"You too, Addie."

Addison's smile quickly faded as she entered the hallway on her journey to the front desk. She balled her hands into tight fists and bit the inside of her cheek. He didn't even look at her. Not once! Okay, once, but only for half of a second to say a stiff 'hello' which was forced by his box. Even when she and Derek had lived in New York together – after everything fell apart – they still communicated with one another. They yelled most of the time, but at least it was talking. Addison wasn't sure what to make of this cold shoulder of his, but she took it as a bad sign. A very bad sign.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N Alright, here it is, chapter 3. As usual…I don't own anything. And as usual…I love Derek Shepherd. Mmm. I'm so pumped for the finale tomorrow!

**C H A P T E R T H R E E**

The rest of the day was more or less fine. Addison spent the day working with Dr. Isobel Stevens – who went by 'Izzie' – a very talented, yet sometimes overly emotionally involved intern on the T.T.T.S. case. It had been twelve hours since Addison had seen Derek and although she was quite certain he was avoiding her, she decided to not let it disrupt her work. But when 8pm rolled around and Addison's work day was over, she was not only exhausted but thinking of Derek once again.

She knew he was still there. She heard one of the residents say they were off to ask his opinion about a case. She knew he was still there but would be leaving soon. So after an overly long internal debate with herself, Addison plopped her near-lifeless body on the uncomfortable maroon chair in the front lobby and stared longingly into the hospital waiting for Derek.

She knew it looked desperate. She knew it looked pathetic. But Addison, although trying her best to look cool and nonchalant, was past the point of playing the role of the innocent wife only in Seattle for work. She knew he could see right though that lie. He could always read her better than anyone else. Of course he could. He was her Derek.

Addison closed her eyes tightly, shaking the circling thoughts from her head. Her mind needed to be clear when she saw Derek. She couldn't be thinking about how desperate she felt or she would come off as so when she talked to him. She was Dr. Addison Montgomery-Shepherd, world renowned neonatal surgeon and damn it, she needed to start acting like it again. That was the Addison that Derek fell in love with, the sometimes overly confident, always had a clever remark, never let anything get to her Addison Shepherd. And Addison was determined to be that woman again, beginning as soon as she spotted Derek walking down the hallway towards the Seattle Grace Hospital exit.

"Derek!" Addison called after him, her red haired curls bouncing up and down as she walked quickly towards him.

He turned around long enough to hold her gaze and then turned back towards the door to leave.

Addison grabbed his arm. "Derek, wait."

"I did," Derek said coldly and shrugged off Addison's grip on his shoulder. "I waited for us to be 'Derek and Addison' again when things got bad in New York. I waited for you to start telling me you loved me again. And I waited for you to stop messing around with my best friend. I'm tired of waiting, Addison."

Addison's stomach dropped at the mention of the horrible separation instigating incident in New York, but she tried to push it aside. "I'm sorry," she said sincerely. Her voice was soft. "I'm so sorry, Derek, you know that. I never meant to hurt you."

"And just what exactly were you trying to do when you were sleeping with Mark?"

"We got successful, you and me," Addison explained. "We got busy and we got lazy. We didn't even bother to fight anymore, Derek. Mark was there and I missed you and now I'm sorry. I'm more sorry than you could possibly imagine, but at least I'm talking to you about it."

"You're a sink with an open drain, Addie," Derek said simply and walked out of the hospital leaving Addison puzzled and, if it was possible, even more exhausted than before.

So Addison followed Derek out the sliding doors, not to exchange more pleading words with him, but only to catch a ferryboat back to her hotel to sleep off the most possibly longest day of her life.

The next morning, Addison woke up surprisingly refreshed and ready to go. It was the dawn of a new day and Addison's mind was made up. Today would be a Derek-free day. She would use today to focus on her patient and dedicate all of her energy only on that. For today, at least. Tomorrow was another day.

However, when she reached Seattle Grace Hospital, Addison immediately saw Derek and couldn't help but let her eyes wander towards him as she walked towards the elevator. Not watching where she was walking, she crashed into another body, causing her Styrophome cup of coffee to go flying and the other woman's papers from her hands to spill across the floor.

"Oh!" Addison exclaimed exasperatedly. "I'm so sorry!"

Addison instantly dropped to the floor to help the woman pick up her scattered papers. Her coffee, though also on the floor, had thankfully missed the woman's papers and only covered the empty tiled floor.

"It's my bad," the other woman apologized to Addison and also bent down to scoop up the papers. "I was totally focused on reading this chart and wasn't even looking where I was going." She laughed and held out her hand for Addison to shake. "Callie Torres, Orthopedics."

Addison stood up, handed Callie her papers and welcomed the handshake. "Addison Shepherd, Obstetrics."

"Shepherd," Callie repeated, looking a little confused. "Any relation to the other Shepherd?"

Addison's eyes shifted to the right. "He's my husband," Addison said dully, pretending to have no interest in the fact.

Callie raised her eyebrows and looked away. "Okay," she said slowly and drew out the second syllable of the word. "Touchy subject. So, what are you doing at Seattle Grace? Do you work here now or something?"

"I'm helping Richard with a case," Addison casually told Callie. Her eyes subtly drifted to the elevator doors, which had closed by then with Derek behind them. She shook it off and turned her attention back to Callie. "I'm only here for a few days."

"Then you're going back to New York?" Callie asked as the two stood in front of the elevator, waiting to board.

"Then I'm going back to New York," Addison told her with a nod, trying to sound sure of herself. "So, you know Derek?"

Callie shrugged. The two stepped on to the empty elevator and watched the doors slide close in front of them. "Not really. You hear things around this hospital, though. More than you want to usually." Callie laughed and Addison joined in. "Ah, but no seriously. Actually, I didn't know he was married."

Addison laughed uncomfortably and looked up. "I'm not surprised. I actually wouldn't be surprised if no one knew."

"Sounds complicated," Callie said sympathetically and the elevator doors slid back open to Callie's floor. "Well, look, I know you don't know me very well, but if you ever wanna talk or anything…I'm around."

Addison smiled happily. "Thanks, I'll keep that in mind."

And although it wasn't Derek that made her smile, Addison was grateful that something finally did.


End file.
